I don’t think you guys understand how much I love fanfiction cliches in my smut. I love them so much. I could read a hundred stories where two characters get locked in a small space or have to share body heat or get caught in a rainstorm and have to take off wet clothes. I’m being completely genuine when I say that I live for smut fanfiction cliches.
mom: hey *dad’s name* oh whoops i mean *brother’s name* oh no *sister’s name* i mean *name of the family goldfish* ah shoot i meant *your name* can you get down here really quick i need something
my dad has literally called me by his own name.
my mother has called me our cats name who has been dead for five years
Houses of Hogwarts.
how many hospital visits do you think st. mungo’s gets from people using engorgio spells on their dick
Okay I’m not even a Star Trek fan but that’s beautiful.
if you went to the louvre and didn’t shake security long enough to rub your dick on the mona lisa a few times, did you really go to the louvre