"i was born in the wrong generation" i say as i steal my grandkids hoverboards because fuck you i was promised these years ago
5 Points will be deducted from Gryffindor ‘cause Harry’s being a little bitch
My dance style ranges from white dad at a barbecue to stripper whose rent is due tomorrow
A lot of people are posting about Five Nights at Freddy’s but I think we’re all missing the most fucked up part of this God Forsaken game.
For 5 nights of work, six hours each, with a job description that basically amounts to “Don’t die at the hands of a bunch of deranged Chuck E Cheese character knock offs”
They pay you $120
For the most stressful, life-threatening 30 hours of your life
They pay you one hundred and twenty dollars
You are making four dollars an hour
"he took a hand to his weeping cock—"
The real problem with books-turned-movies isn’t “omg they didn’t include every single word in the book” it’s “omg they completely overlooked the main theme, threw out any significant allegories, took away all the emotional pull, an turned it into a boring action movie with a love triangle in it”
The Most Haunted Objects of All Time - The Cursed “Chair of Death” Kills All Who Sit in It
In 1702, a convicted murderer named Thomas Busby was about to be hanged for his crimes. His last request was to have his final meal served at his favorite pub in Thirsk, England. He finished his meal, stood up, and said, “May sudden death come to anyone who dare sit in my chair.”
The chair remained in the pub for centuries, and patrons would often dare one another to sit in the cursed seat. During World War II, airmen from a nearby base frequented the pub, and locals noticed that the soldiers who sat in the chair would never return from war.
In 1967, two Royal Air Force pilots sat in the chair, only to crash their truck into a tree just after they left. In 1970, a mason tested his fate in the hot seat, only to die that same afternoon by falling into a hole at his job site. A year after that, a roofer who sat in it died after the roof he was working on collapsed. When the pub’s cleaning lady tripped and fell into the chair, she died shortly afterwards from a brain tumor.
This list goes on, and finally the pub owner moved the chair into the basement. Unfortunately, even in storage the chair claimed another victim. After a delivery man took a quick rest while unloading packages in the store room, he was killed in a car accident that same day.
Eventually, the pub owner donated the chair to the local museum in 1972. The museum displays the chair by hanging it five feet in the air so that no one can possibly sit in it by mistake again. Fortunately, no one has sat in the chair since.